My Worst Character Defect; But Why I Think it Might Be Okay

    Alright, I know the title is kind of funny, and I am not just desperate to get more people to read my blogs, lol.  I don't know, maybe...
     I have a bad temper, and am really hypersensitive, especially about things I believe strongly in, and although A Course in Miracles has taught me that, as in the lessons, in my defenselessness, my safety lies, and love holds no grievances.  These are two entirely different lessons, but I forget to put them into practice.  I like Mathew, Sermon on the Mount, Jesus's words, "blessed are the meek, the poor..."  I also like David's, Psalm 23, ...He prepareth me a table in the presence of my enemies..., and I like Gandhi's favorite song, Sita Ram, which translates in part, King Ram...  Savior of the downtrodden...  Then the Mohammad part about, bless us so that we may act truly, dovetailing the ever fighting Hindus and Muslims, coming together, like as Meher Baba, prophesied, "beads on a string."  I think it will be a very long time before that happens, probably not in our life, because of the religious fanatics who ruin it for the rest. In fact Gandhi was assassinated by a religious fanatic.  That is what I was taught in my South Carolina, public education, which gives what you want to get from it.  
     I do not mean to act like I know everything.  I know I am really opinionated about touchy subjects, like abortion, and I know I piss people off, and people piss me off.  To tell you the truth, sometimes I feel ashamed of the things I say on my blogs, and ashamed of my opinions, because they are not popular, and I am not as liberal as most of my peers, or many of my peers.  But, today I thought, why do I always feel guilty about what I think and say?  I am not intentionally attacking anyone.  I do not think I should feel ashamed.  Marianne Williamson, who is very popular, and of course I know I am no Marianne Williamson, although we are both Jewish, is pretty pro-life in the things she says, and I do not think she feels guilty for saying what she thinks.  I guess I have always doubted myself.  My cousin, a songwriter, singer, guitar player, wrote a song called, Do You Like Me?.  The words say, do I meet with your approval, do you think that I'm okay...  I want you to like me...
His name is Rick Golden, by the way. I do not know if he ever had any major success.  We lost touch years ago, although when I was a teenager and he was twenty something, I remember going to some big concert or rally, or both, in Boston, and taking our guitars with us.  I do not think we ever got to play there, though, that I remember.  One of my Boston memories.  They lived in the suburbs of Boston, Framingham, and my grandparents lived in Chelsea, part of Boston.  
     The song, very upbeat (my ex husband, my kids and I used to dance to it), is what I am talking about.  I mean, why should I always want to meet with everyone's approval?  Is it a family thing, a universal thing, low self-esteem, fear?  Are we all like this?  I know politicians do not seem to fear what people think.  I sort of agree with Obama, but sort of agree with South Carolina Senator Lindsay Graham, that intelligence has kind of gone down hill a bit, in terms of the shortcomings where the latest terrorism is concerned, but I am not going to get into that.  I have blogged on what I think of Boston enough.  I am going to stop going on with that now.  I think I got it out of my system now.  I hope you will accept me, as I will accept you, and I will only act badly if I am drinking...  joke, lol...