Often one feels that if only one had such and such, then there would be happiness. Then, when "the thrill is gone," like the B. B. King song, we often pursue something or someone else.
I am not saying that good stress and trying to accomplish things is not important, only that in my own experience, although I have done many things, I find sometimes when a project is done or a relationship over, or even a friendship that ended, that I need to find a new goal. I might even feel empty. If I were living in the now though, I would not feel this way. I would be fine with what is, and enjoy the quietude in between each event. In a way I do.
Many people think that a new relationship or job, perhaps buying something big or small, will achieve greater satisfaction, but to quote another song, Mick Jagger, "I can't get no satisfaction."
So, one may think, if I do not have ambition, how will I get anywhere? There is certainly a place for ambition, and some are more ambitious than others, which we all know can certainly lead to success, financially, socially, in terms of prestige. But what if we do not meet these criteria? What if life is not the mold we thought it should be, and things did not turn out quite right? Then what?
I think a person can only do their best. I want things I cannot have. I will admit it. I will not get into what they are here, but this does not mean I cannot mindfully accept things as they are.
The more serenity and acceptance I have, the better. The more I 'let go and let God,' to quote an AA expression, the better I feel. I still have to take care of responsibility, but I do not need to be a 'control freak' about it. I have tried that, it is just a pain.
Now, I am just going with the flow and believing that everything is as it should be now. Now is everything, as in The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.
One of my grievances and I have a few, is not being appreciated or respected. There are people who do not believe in any of my talent. Why then, should I be upset about that? What does it matter what they think? Often people will not recognize you, because of fear that their own importance may dissolve, but that is their problem. The best thing is to keep on doing the things you love, and if you can reach one person, then be happy for that.
Lastly, many people go from relationship to relationship, because like Jackson Browne says, "and your perfect lover just looks like a perfect fool... fountain of sorrow." However, the next person will not be everything either, and as I told in the story Skeleton Woman from Women Who Run With the Wolves, by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, PhD., the 'one' as they say, can be flawed. No one is perfect, and no one will ever find a perfect person, so the answer is to accept someone, unless they are truly a bad person, abusive, etc.. In that case, one should say goodbye and show the door.
But, no matter what, nothing will bring perfect contentment. Many rich people are miserable. Many married people are miserable. Many successful people are miserable. I know all too well, how disappointing life can be, and that is where acceptance, doing one's best and unconditional love for self that extends to others, is the answer. Only by mindfully being here and now, can we truly find peace, love and happiness. Namaste.
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