I Can't Find the Right Actress for 'Lizzy,' lol, But the Truth is Deep Down She is More Like Me than I Want to Admit

     I know I have bad eyesight, but I searched through pictures of female movie stars, looking for someone who I thought could play 'Lizzy' in my novel, American Boys, not because it is becoming a movie, but because I thought I needed a compass to describe her, if anyone wanted to know how she looked, beyond their imagination.  She is totally not the main character, by any stretch of the imagination.  I could not, however, find anyone, who in anyway reminded me of her, when I looked at actress pictures, except, for a moment I had to take a second glance at Drew Barrymore, but recalling Drew's looks in the movies, they did not exactly match the picture, and I know as lovely as she is, she is not the right one to portray 'Lizzy.'  Look, I know I am not making a movie, not now anyway.
     However, I feel there was something to the way Drew Barrymore looked in that particular picture, that drew me in.  I guess they all looked too glamorous, and although my Lizzy is very beautiful, in a very natural, 'outward bound,' earthy, blond type of way, she is not glamorous, at all, in a maybeline kind of way, but nor is she plain.  Well, I take that back.  She is a little plain sometimes, and maybe even, as Alan would have said, "mousy,"

some of the time, but you know what I mean.  She is only plain, because she is tired and overworked, that is all.
     I like Drew Barrymore.  She is cool, and really pretty, and so are they all.  I just can't find anyone with the right amount of prettiness, and the right amount of plainness, if that makes sense at all.  
     I guess I realized when I wrote about taking my older son to college, for the first time, that Lizzy was more like me, than I was admitting, and the whole book was more autobiographical than I wanted to admit, although I really made things easier in the book, and in some ways the book is completely different.
     So, if you think, "why would she think her life way anything special?," well I don't.  My ego has been beaten down to pulp, it really has, so do not get the wrong idea.  I have experienced character assassination, galore, and not from Meher Baba followers, that I know of, so thanks for that if you are one, but there is a whole 'nother world,' as Michael Jackson would say, out there, and it is not always nice, in my opinion.
     I did see an actress, a television actress, on Law and Order, on the Special Victims Unit series, who was one of the cops, but not a regular, who did remind me of Lizzy, but I cannot remember even the character's name.
She played a cop, from the south, which is all I can remember, and not Star, the FBI agent, going under cover, to infiltrate a white supremacy group, but a different actress.
     Well, so much for my book, for now, and I am sure you probably know what I mean, more than I know.